Most of you have safely assumed I'm a strange bird by now. I think it's time I share some more of my quirks just to validate your assumptions.
Quirk #512- I have weird phobias..
Today's weird phobia you ask...books that are most commonly referred to as "library books".
Why do I possess such a ridiculous phobia?
Well, there just so happens to be a place some people aka EVERYONE take most books they are currently reading.. The place I speak of would in fact be, the toilet.
Don't look like a deer caught in the headlights. Take a deep breath and 'fess up.
I know you hold books while you poop on the toilet. I also happen to know you hold them even as you flush the toilet. This creates airborne feces that land all over your precious poo books.
So, please forgive me if I'm not exactly jumping at the idea of going down to the Gilbert Public Library to grab that feces infested copy of The Hunger Games you were telling me about. Why don't I just eat some raw ground beef and contract ecoli way?
I do love the smell of a good book fresh from the toilet oops, I mean the library.. Do you catch my whiff or I mean drift?
I know you hold books while you poop on the toilet. I also happen to know you hold them even as you flush the toilet. This creates airborne feces that land all over your precious poo books.
So, please forgive me if I'm not exactly jumping at the idea of going down to the Gilbert Public Library to grab that feces infested copy of The Hunger Games you were telling me about. Why don't I just eat some raw ground beef and contract ecoli way?
I do love the smell of a good book fresh from the toilet oops, I mean the library.. Do you catch my whiff or I mean drift?
Library books= poo books= Go to Barnes & Noble be the first and only one to accompany your book to the porcelain throne.
Sincerely,
Sarah
PS- Do you have any weird phobias that you want to share! I'd love to have you guest post!
haha! this is so funny - i never thought about it but its probably true. ew!
ReplyDeleteI hadn't thought of it that way either,,,,GOOD POINT!! I knew there was a reason I didn't frequent the library. HAHA...I like having my own personal copy of my favorite book anyway,,I think I will stick to that method.
ReplyDeleteI can only really think of one phobia I have, and that is swimming in water where I can't see my toes...that FREAKS me out. I think something is going to bite my toe or leg off,,and not just some small minnow of a fish,,,my imagination runs wild with sea serpents and crazy water monsters down there where I cannot see. :) YIKES..lol
Have A Great Day!!!
ha, you are too funny girl! and this is probably true! don't worry though, my weirdest phobia is being afraid of librarians. i know what you are thinking, whaaaat? i blame "are you afraid of the dark", ha
ReplyDeletexo TJ